Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Speaking Kindly

Family Home Evening Lesson
“Speaking Kindly”

Opening Song: “Jesus Said Love Everyone”
Children's Songbook #61

Opening Prayer: Child
Lesson: Daddy
Ask your children what kindess is. Explain that kindess is being nice to people. (show a picture of Jesus) Jesus was always nice to everyone and we should try to be like Him. One way to show kindess is to speak nicely.

Object lesson: Filling Other's Jars
Have an empty clear jar or cup on display. You can have one for each child (you can tape a picture of each child on the jar/cup). Then have a bowl of marbles (or candy) and a bowl of rocks (or something the kids don't like eating). Explain that the bowl of marbles/candy represents nice words (you can tape a picture of a smiley face on the bowl) and the bowl of rocks/yucky food represent mean words (you can tape a picture of a frowny face on the bowl). Explain that every time we say something to others it is like putting something in their jar. Give an example of something said recently and put the appropriate rock or marble in the jar. (ex: child A called child B a snot face. Put a rock in child B's jar. OR child A told child B that he loved her. Put a marble in child B's jar) Do as many examples as hold their attention and make them as relevant to the phrases they use or should be using as you can. (You may want to write them down ahead of time so you can remember which ones you want to discourage or encourage)

Ask the children if they would prefer their jars to be filled with rocks or marbles? How do they feel when a rock gets put in their jar? What about when a marble gets put in their jar? Tell them that we are in charge of fillling each other's jars and we should fill them the way that we want ours filled (the golden rule). You can keep these jars on display throughout the week and add the appropriate rocks/marbles as you hear kind words or not so kind words. Make sure to reinforce kind speaking if you hear unkind words. (We are having issues with our 4 year old talking back, so we'll probably do jars for Mom and Dad as well)

Update: My 4 1/2 year old really latched on to the idea of putting rocks or marbles in people's jars. It really seemed to resonate with her and she was able to easily apply the concept. She was able to come up with many things that were considered rocks or marbles throughout the rest of the evening. My 2 1/2 year old just wanted to put the rocks or marbles in her jar, regardless of why...

Practicing Tone: Let's practice speaking in different ways. First say "No Thankyou" but in an angry voice. Now say "No Thankyou" in a happy voice. Which was a kinder tone? Now try shouting "Go get the book!" Now whisper it. Which was better? Now say "I love you" with a frown and a pouty voice, then with a smile and a sweet voice. Point out that it is much kinder to smile while saying nice things. Emphasize that to speak kindly it's not just the words that matter, but it's the way we speak- our tone, volume, expression/body language. You may want to practice more phrases depending on your children.

Suggested Activity:
Play "Kindness ball toss" by tossing a ball to someone in the family and saying something nice about that person. Prompt young children to say easy things like "Pretty eyes", "I love you", or "Nice shirt."

Craft:
Help children to decorate their jars, use sequins, beads, stickers, ribbons, whatever you have on hand. (Both my girls loved this part)

Closing Song: “I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus"
Children's Songbook #78

Closing Prayer: Mommy

Treat:
Goblin Tongues from FamilyFun.com (mouths and tongues to emphasize paying attention to what words are coming out of our mouths)

RECIPE INGREDIENTS:

Mini bagels
Cream cheese
Bologna slices
1. For each Goblin Tongue sandwich, spread cream cheese between the top and bottom of a mini bagel.
2. Use a butter knife or kitchen shears to cut a tongue shape from a half slice of bologna. Then gently press the base of the tongue into the bagel hole.

25 comments:

Me, Myself and I said...

ldslistings.blogspot.com

Krazy Kirbys said...

Also a good song for this lesson would be, "let us all speak kind words." I really don't know if that is the title but I am sure you all know it well.
Great site!!!
Thanks,
Becky Kirby

Kerri said...

I love this lesson idea! Thank you!

Jana said...

Exactly what we need to work on right now, THANK YOU and it is a very cute lesson!! :)

Alicia said...

This sounds like such a fun lesson for small kids. I can't wait to try it out. I think my kids are going to love it!!

Stephanie M Larsen said...

I appreciate all your ideas so much, and especially this one. Thanks for taking the time to post them, it's really a blessing for so many families. :)

The Richardsons said...

I just wanted to thank you for going to all this work and posting it here for others to see and use. I check your blog all the time and have used many of your great ideas. Thank You Thank You!

P.S. You should come up with a button that people could put on their blogs for your site, I would totally do it! (I already have a link, but a button would be so cute!)

Erika said...

Richardson's- go here: http://nataliesfhespot.blogspot.com/2009/05/family-home-evening-spot-button.html

Shauna said...

Thank you so much for sharing your FHE lessons...it is a great help to me. My small children loved this lesson and were very upset when I a rock in their jar instead of a chocolate chip.

Sam said...

I really like this idea, thanks!

The DeMarcus Family said...

I loved this, and so did my boys! Thank you for making FHE a snap!

Bonnie said...

You are amazing. I need to start using your ideas for Clark:)

Ruth Worthington said...

I am using this one tonight! Thank you!! :)

WinTers OuT LoUd said...

I feel like my 4 yr old is the mean kid on the block. Thanks for the great idea. I will be teaching this tonight!

Alli said...

THANK YOU for the great idea! Coming across your blog was very timely & I'm going to use this lesson immediately! I'll use M&M's and (since our town/state is currently under a foot of snow) buttons. Hopefully my 2 boys (age 5 & 3) will internalize this right away! Thanks again! :)

Peggy said...

Oh you wonderful, wonderful girl. Thank you for this great lesson. It is truly an answer to our prayers. My son is being so mouthy these days and threatening us with the most outlandish things when he doesn't get his way. ("Fine! Then I won't fix your water pipes when they break!" Um, okay...) Anyhoo--this is a great lesson and I know it'll work wonders. You rock. (Not, like, "in a jar" sort of way!)

Preston Family said...

Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful lesson idea! Just what I was looking for. What a treasure this blog is for LDS families!

Amanda said...

@Winters Out Loud: I feel like my kid is the "mean kid" on the block too! I'm excited to try this lesson tonight and see if it makes a difference.

I love this site! Thanks for all the great ideas/lessons!

~Amanda

Ashley said...

Thank you! This is perfect for our son right now.

Jaime said...

Yea! Thanks. I knew I wanted an FHE lesson about kindness and hoped I would be able to quickly find something great online--this will be perfect for my almost 4-year-old tonight (she needs some practice saying kind things to her toddler sister).

Emily said...

I loved this idea. We used this lesson at our house a little while ago and it was just what I was looking for. I did a post about it on my blog, www.mycrazybliss.com

Karie said...

Perfect! Thank you! Exactly what I need for tonight!

lindsy said...

we used this lesson tonight for family home evening. My kids loved talking about Jesus the best and how he was kind to everyone no matter what. We used rocks and M&Ms and made a goal as a family to speak with kindness. We'll check to see how we're doing tomorrow at dinner. Thank you. Can't wait to look through your other ideas :)

Kimberly Porter said...

What a great lesson! My boys really need this right now!! :)

Kimberly Porter said...

What a great lesson! My boys really need this right now!! :)